Third Book, First Chapter

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARRY POTTER!!!! Though I had long neglected writing about Harry Potter on this blog (until I broke my taboo) today is different. Today we must celebrate. Today, July 31st, is Harry James Potter's birthday. I will be celebrating later by swapping Harry Potter trivia and making cauldron cakes. (I'll post pictures later.) This post however, will be devoted to my love of the books in general and my favorite book of the seven, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.

When I was seven years old I started reading Harry Potter with my family. My parents used to read to me and my siblings every night before we went to bed. It was even more touching that they would read ahead and when we were getting to a scary part, they would stop and wait for the next day. Harry Potter didn't make me a reader (though it did that for so many others) or even introduce me to fantasy. I was already a voracious reader dreaming about magic. But what the books did do was teach me what it meant to fall in love. I didn't fall in love with reading, with the world, or the characters. I fell in love with the experience that is Harry Potter. I fell in love with breaking the binding of the books, of memorizing the order of the chapters, of pretending to be Hermione Granger, and of making predictions and counting down the days until the next book came out. I fell in love with the experience of being drawn into a literary community. Now that I'm in college I have so many friends that I get to discuss literature with and share our favorite books. I will be eternally grateful to J. K. Rowling for introducing me to this experience.

Now on to my favorite book. Somehow Prisoner of Azkaban gets lost in the shuffle. To me, there's something so amazing about Harry learning more about his parents, their friendships, and finally getting that father-figure. And of course, I cheer every time Gryffindor finally wins the inter-house quidditch cup. It also seems relevant to me today, that it is the only one of two books (Chamber of Secrets is the other) that actually starts on Harry's birthday, even though they all start in the summer. The first line is, "Harry Potter was a highly unusual boy in many ways" (Rowling 1). A few pages later it says, "Yet another unusual thing about Harry was how little he looked forward to his birthdays" (Rowling 5). But in the first chapter of the third book Harry gets his first ever birthday cards and presents. He has been in the wizarding world, with people who actually love him, long enough to feel normal. Normal in this case, does not mean non-magical, but simply means that he has friends and people who care about him. And with that essay-like discussion I would like to say goodbye, because I have some rereading to do.

Playing With a Loose Tooth

When my brother lost his first tooth I was shocked to discover that not everyone gushes blood when a tooth comes out. I learned that this is because instead of tugging at it until the tooth fell out, my brother just let it happen. I on the other hand could never handle waiting for my tooth to fall out but would play with it constantly until I couldn't handle it any more and just yanked. The result was blood and a rush to clean my mouth up before I got anything stained.
While this may sound gross, a bit graphic, and entirely irrelevant I promise that I do have a point. For over two years I have been struggling with parts of Guardians that don't seem to make sense and it's been like having that loose tooth. Like a loose tooth, the problem was just there and I kept playing with it and nothing happened. So I did the smart thing, ignored the problem, and just kept writing. While ignoring a problem isn't usually recommended it was necessary so that I could actually finish the story. But yesterday the answer fell into place, just like my brother's teeth used to fall out. The answer was so blindingly obvious that I was amazed that I didn't think of it earlier. But I guess that I just needed to be working with the plot for a while, understand the world I wanted to create and follow the rules I had made for it. And then, just like a loose tooth, the idea fell out of my mind onto the paper.

Chapter One

When things get hard anxieties take over. I feel like this is as much a fact of life as gravity (maybe even more so though probably not). But, when you return to the beginning the joy resurfaces, you feel the fresh air and remember, "oh yeah, I actually like what I'm doing." Towards the end of this past semester my posts started to get heavy and slightly stressed out. I've talked about the power of desire and how it drives me. But I've never focused on the darker side of desire. If you want something so badly it can seem like the world will end if you don't get what you want. Yes I want to be a published author one day. No I don't want to be paralyzed with fear every time I pick up a pen. My entire first year of college was one long battle with desire, pride, and fear. But no longer.
It's not that I'm never going to be a afraid of failure. That's natural. And I'm sure that at some point I'll be overwhelmed by how much I want to be a writer and lose track of the now. None of that should matter. Those are facts like anxiety is a fact. What's more important is that I LOVE to write and I'm happiest when I'm living in my head, listening to the words inside me (yes that was a bit sappy but it's cool). This summer I've been editing Guardians in the sense that I've been working on doubling it to get it to novel instead of novella length. And I realized that I love what I'm doing. There's nothing inside thinking what if this goes wrong, or what if this plot point doesn't work, or how is everything going to fit in with what I have? No voices except for the one I'm working to develop as a writer (oh hey, another bad joke). Just a girl doing what she cares about.
Muting the anxiety has actually paid off. I'm at a point where I have a fairly solid outline of what's to come and...drum roll please...introducing....CHAPTER ONE!!! That's right!!!! For a person unable to do more than divide her story into sections I have created a new beginning and found the courage to give it a name or in laymen's terms call it a chapter. Right now it's just called Chapter One but I have two or three names that I'm toying with. It's exciting to think that one day readers could open Guardians of Cornerstone and read this:

"Shana!" Eve Hearbweaver called. "Shana come to breakfast! It's an important day!"
Shana Herbweaver clambered down a rope ladder. It swung from the ceiling as she leapt nimbly onto the stone kitchen floor. "Sorry Mama. I was tinkering in the attic."

Well there it is. The first few sentences of an unpublished Chapter One.

Fake It Till You Make It

In writing you have to talk the talk before you can walk the walk. What I mean is you have to believe that you can do it until you actually can. One of my favorite (and oft quoted) authors Sarah Beth Durst talks about how to lie to yourself in her fabulous blog. I'm not quite talking about that, though it is good advice and a great place to start.What I mean by faking it until you make it is something more concrete. I've started to dream big, about the future when Guardians is published and I'll be able to take the "aspiring" part off of my title of aspiring author. So this past week I began to pretend that I was being interviewed about my first novel, Guardians of Cornerstone. Is it presumptuous? Perhaps but no one has heard it but me. And the mock interview was helpful. I began to talk about my characters and what I want people to get out of the story. During the course of my mental interview I was able to make two break throughs in my writing.

1. Where are the parents? As I'm beginning to rewrite/add to the story parents do come in to play but not enough. To me, writing is about capturing human relationships and I've left about a crucial one: parent/child. Your own life changes your writing and as I've been making my way through college my own relationship with my parents has been evolving. That being said, I feel like I have something to say about the topic and what I write will ground the piece in reality even as it's being written in a fantasy world.

2. Kalynn. In my last post about Kalynn I was having a hard time figuring out exactly who she was as a character. While I'm not quite there I do have a better idea of who she is. Kalynn is imaginative to the point of going overboard. In a new scene (not ready to be revealed) she has some plants trap Shana because she thinks there's an attacker coming after her. While creativity and imagination will make her a great Mingler (someone who comes into our world) you know what they say about too much of a good thing. Kalynn is easily excitable and sometimes lets her imagination get the better of her. 

It's a confidence boost to pretend that some big newspaper or tv show is interviewing you because if you can picture it in your head then it's already a possibility. While the whole visualization thing may sound cheesy (and it does) it also just may work.

On a completely unrelated note be sure to go to The Notebook tab and read an update to my Pillow Fort story as well as a completely new one

Pitch Black...?

I've been reading a lot lately which obviously has been wonderful. Something that I've noticed is that the protagonist has to figure out who to trust and who might ultimately betray them. And then I got to thinking...what if I wrote about the person who you shouldn't trust? What is they are a self-proclaimed bad guy who is actually good? What if I get to mix morality and magic and confuse myself in the process? (In the best way possible.) 
I wanted to take a nap when this idea popped into my head. My eyes were closing and the opening line came into my head. I wanted it to go away. You know, go into the saved as draft folder in my brain. It didn't want to. Other authors have characters talking at them. I have words floating in my mind and threatening to escape out my ears. So before it got drenched by the humidity in my room I wrote it down.

They say trust no one and they are right. I would know.
I am no one.

So the words should have been satisfied. I lay back down and tried to fall asleep. Then I saw more words. Clearly it was time to wake up. Here's the beginning of what will hopefully be my next short story. (In the continued attempt to expand what I write.)

They say trust no one and they are right. I would know.
I am no one.
My name is Afchada and I was trained from birth to spy, trick, betray, steal, and even kill. This is the path I was born to and the path I have chosen to follow.
You should know about me. You should be warned. I'm not a cliche, I'm deadlier than that. 
For one thing I don't wear all black. I've no idea why anyone ever thought that was a good thing. All black is obvious. I wear what I want. My favorite color is purple so I wear a lot of that.
For anther, I work for no one. I'm no spy for hire. I am still a "bad guy" in laymen's terms.
Bad guys work to bring seemingly stable governments down. Bad guys seek to populate the world with their rulers.
However, we tell the truth.
It's the good guys who lie.

I showed the piece to one of my roommates and she commented that it seemed really dark. Yes it's darker than I've ever written before. I haven't began to unpack Afchada but I want her to have a really cynical, sarcastic sense of humor. She is a good person doing bad things for the right reason. But what is right? Is she the hero that we first meet? Is what I've written a prologue of sorts?

The next step is tricky because I don't want to over-philosophize and I don't want to be too cliche. I do want to create a magic CIA that works to bring justice to the world using tactics that may seem to harsh or extreme. And I want to create a new type of heroine who isn't "good" in the typical sense and that we don't always like but ends up winning our hearts. 

A Non-Conclusion

It's time for another installment of "Over My Shoulder," where I try to bring the four main protagonists of Guardians of Cornerstone alive for my benefit and yours. Today it's time to meet Kalynn. She's the only one of my characters who isn't human. She is in fact an earth sprite complete with green-streaked hair, pointy ears, and skin that is tinged green. She even blushes green instead of red! Kalynn is Shana's best friend and the character that in some ways I know the least about. All I do know is that it takes a lot of strength to be best friends with Shana.

"What are you doing?"
I can't see Kalynn anymore but I can feel her. She got bored on my shoulder and climbed up to my head. "Why are you up here again?"
"I got bored. And I can see better from here."
"You can't read the words as well."
"No but I can see your hand and I can watch your facial expressions. It helps me know how to react to you."
"Do you want to grow larger and come sit next to me? Shana did."
Kalynn slides back down onto my shoulder. She sits there reading what I've written. But she's unable to stay still and I can feel her feet tapping out a rhythm on my arm. "I'm not Shana remember? If you want me on your shoulder that's where I'll be."
"But I want you to be happy. I don't want you to just do what I tell you to."
Kalynn is in the middle of doing a handstand on my shoulder blade. How she's staying balanced in beyond me. "I am doing what I want to." She lands on her feet. "Handstands are so much fun."
"So you're not bored with how I'm writing you?"
"I always have fun." Now she's attempting a split. I'm afraid she'll fall off. She does but the flower on my shirt comes alive in a twinkle of green light and catches her.
"I liked this shirt." 
"I can put it back on if you want. But it still looks good. It's just different than how it was before."
"Do you have flaws? Sometimes it's hard to write you so happy and helpful all the time. And don't just tell me that you can't stand up for yourself because I know that you can."
Her mouth droops in a pout and she stops climbing up the flower's stem. "Am I boring?"
"I can't figure you out."
She beams. "That's the beauty of me. I'm not easily readable, you have to spend time with me to figure it out."
Then she does grow to full size and puts a pen in my hand. "I think it's time you got back to work."

This one was longer than some of the others. As you can see, I didn't even reach any conclusions. Instead I'm just going to have to keep writing about Kalynn and I'll get there eventually.

Check out Shana and Ben sitting on my shoulder!

A Few Changes

Just as I'm learning how to be a writer I'm also learning how to be a blogger. I want my posts to be enjoyable, informative, and make readers want to look at my writing. You'd think after two and a half years I'd have things figured out but I don't know if I ever will. That's okay though because the theme of this blog is really just keep trying until things works out. To that end, I've cut a few pages out of the blog because I want to streamline the reading experience. Readers can now look at my posts, read excerpts from my to-be-published-one-day (hopefully) novel Guardians of Cornerstone, check out passages from future stories, and read my attempt at short stories.

So please do! And then share it with your friends!   

Some Non-Cliche Title

It's hard to figure out how to describe what I'm doing when I decide to stop working on Guardians every day and just write every day. (Hence the title of this post, there's no pretty or clever way to say it.) That isn't to say that I won't continue to work on Guardians (it's my unfinished pride and joy) but that I'm going to write new stuff as well. Throughout my day I'm talking to my friends, going places, and reading books. Everything gives me ideas and every time I get one I say to myself, "I want to write about that," but then it ends up getting shelved because I'm working on Guardians. Occasionally an idea fits into the Guardians plot but in reality every piece of magic can't fit into one story--that would be way too confusing. 

So most days, instead of adding new parts to Guardians, I'll actually get to work on these ideas. There won't be any outlines in my way and I won't have to worry about character development or keeping my plot consistent. It'll be back to basics, ink and paper (welcome to more cliches) and fun. I write to create other worlds, to escape within my imagination and I don't want to limit myself. And then, when I do return to Guardians for a day or two I'll have a new outlook and give it true life.

Hemingway to the Rescue

It's been an interesting process editing a manuscript that needs doubling. It's not like I'm just going through and fixing scenes or taking out lines, I'm literally adding pages and pages. I'm taking out entire chunks and trying to find places for new parts. There's a whole new beginning and scenes that I make passing reference to in my first draft are actually going to be fully written out. It's a lot harder in some ways because I want to be writing something that is consistent with what already exists. And it's hard to keep going sometimes because a) it's confusing. I have multiple plot lines in my head. The one that currently exists, the new one I've outlined out, and ones that pop into my head as I write. b) There are times when I just want to say, "am I done yet?" That would be great if one day I woke up and found out that the manuscript had edited itself. 

Enter Ernest Hemingway to save me.

Hemingway was a genius. I mean, he was scared from war and mentally unstable but his writing was great and he knew what he was doing. He gave great advice about writing too. Here's my favorite quote: 

“The best way is always to stop when you are going good and when you know what will happen next. If you do that every day … you will never be stuck.” 

Something about the simplicity of the advice struck me and I really had a "duh" moment (please excuse the use of the word duh but it's appropriate in this context.) Usually when I'm writing I scene I try and go until there's a definitive end point, a place where I can stick three asterisks *** and call it a day. But lately I've realized that this is a stupid approach. Anything that you're writing after you've become uninspired or bored is useless. If you happen to finish a piece because you love it so be it. But if you don't happen to know exactly where exactly the scene is going why force something? Lately, I've been writing as much as I feel like and when the inspiration stops so do I.

How does Hemingway help me edit? I write what's good and end when it's good and throw out my confusion. I'll worry about making everything fit when I have enough to fit. But for now, as long as it's good I'll keep on writing.

Ben Gets Things Right

Welcome to another installment of Over My Shoulder. Today I'll be writing about Ben. Full disclosure, Ben is by far the easiest character to write and the one who I understand the best. He's the problem solver, totally go-with-the-flow and is always determined to enjoy himself no matter where he lands...even if it's in an alternate universe.

I'm editing a Ben and Shana scene, they've just gotten trapped in Ancient Rome. Shana has devolved into a complete wreck and Ben is trying to fix everything. I'm not even writing, just looking at the flow of their dialogue and checking out my language choice.
Ben's not saying anything, he's barely moving. He's just watching my pen hover an inch or so above the page, waiting for me to make a mark.
"You could say something."
"You're thinking, that takes time."
"Yeah but you're here to help me, not watch. And I'm stuck."
He slides off my shoulder, down my arm and lands on the pages. "Ok then." He begins to walk across my scribbled-over paragraphs. "No, you're doing a good job. This is how things would have happened."
I hand him my pen. I trust him to only make positive changes, ones that I would approve of. He doesn't take it though.
"You would tell me if something was wrong right? You're not someone who lies just to be nice."
"Yeah I would. But you're fine right now. Don't sweat it and keep going."

That's Ben for you. Can't you see why he's a joy to write? He wants to help, is so nice, and is incredibly level-headed. Each of the other protagonists are a bit hyperbolic in one way or another and it's up to Ben to stay mellow. But, lest you think that he's too perfect his flaw is in his good qualities. Ben tries to overfix in a way. He MUST be able to put the pieces back together and solve everyone else's problems. When he gets transported to Cornerstone he has to sit back and let Shana, a girl he doesn't know, doesn't like, and barely trusts do the initial work, which is completely frustrating. Still, he's an angel when it comes to writing and he's the only one of my four heroes who I occasionally feel sitting on my shoulder.